Enough Of The Somber Mood Here... *weg*

Time for some laughs again!! :)

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
*
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note
to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
*
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint-conditioner.
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower.
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Dry with a towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

______________________________________

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
them in a pile.
*
Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror admiring the size of
your wiener and scratch your ass.
*
Get in the shower.
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Wash your face.
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Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

*
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stick on the
soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of
tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife,
pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.

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Throw wet towel on bed.